Hiya everyone! I know the title of this blog post is a bit out there but trust me, it has meaning. This blog post was triggered by me seeing a tweet on my feed by someone I follow who was indirectly body shaming (and ironically had “body positivity” in their bio) and I was like enough is enough, I am writing a blog post about why so so many people body shame without realising what they are doing. Also, this may be triggering for any one having problems with their weight because I do mention my past struggles.
#1 – Avoiding the word “fat”. Avoiding this word makes it seem like having fat is a negative thing. Avoiding the word fat makes the word itself seem like a horrible thing to be and that’s not true. Having fat is not a bad thing, everyone has it. It’s also just an adjective. You can call a cat fat so why is it any different? Avoiding the word only increases the negative connotation with the word.
#2 – Judging other people’s clothes. Let’s keep it real here, I know no one is innocent from judging someone’s clothing. I know practically everyone sees someone walking past them, who is wearing something you portray as odd, whilst you’re with your friends and you all have a giggle. But this is actually kinda horrible. Also, when people argue that someone with a smaller chest cannot pull something off like a bigger chested person can, or vice versa. Why don’t we just let people wear whatever they feel comfortable in and not judge them for it?
#3 – The made up names for body parts. I know you’re reading this and thinking “what?” but hear me out, I couldn’t think of a better way to describe this point. Words of made up body parts that spring to mind is; muffin top, love handles, cankles etc. Why do any of these things that happen to normal people’s body have negative associations to them? If someone refers to love handles, they are seen in a bad light, why?
#4 – “You don’t look fat, you look beautiful”. Again, stating unintentionally that having fat means you’re not beautiful. You can be fat and gorgeous. Fat and any “positive” adjective is not mutually exclusive.
#5 – Pretend compliments. For example, if I was wearing a crop top that showed off my tummy and someone told me that I was brave for wearing it – that’s a pretend compliment. Why is someone worthy of the brave title for just simply wearing an item of clothing?! It’s beyond me.
#6 – Congratulating people for losing weight. This annoys me so much! I once saw someone I hadn’t seen since going vegan (back story: I was always slightly chubby since a young age and wasn’t eating the right foods for me, so naturally when I went vegan initially, I lost weight), they mentioned how I look good for it. Meaning, me losing weight was a good thing. But in my head now is the thought that if I gain that weight back that I no longer look good.
#7 – Making people nothing more than things to lust over for the other genders. I’ve heard this a lot because of my big boobs and wide hips. I often hear people say “you’re so curvy! I bet you have boys all over you”. Don’t make people think they are nothing but a prize for someone else to have.
#8 – Remaking all compliments about weight. To be honest, I used to be quite bad with this one and I am trying to work on it. For example, when someone compliments you by telling you look great and your reply is “Thanks! I’ve lost weight since the last time I saw you!”. This has to be stamped out asap because it again associates weight with beauty.
#9 – Keeping smaller sizes clothing just in case. I am so bad with this. I am a good size 12 in jeans but yet, I’m still keeping my size 10 and 8 jeans
from many years ago for the off-chance that I may fit into the again. I used to have a pretty expensive dress in my wardrobe when I was deep into my eating problems, telling myself I’d fit into it. I constantly got into states because I didn’t fit into it. This notion is kinda keeping body shaming well fuelled because you are telling yourself that your body isn’t good enough until it fits into those clothes.
#10 – And finally, considering certain foods are evil. Many people associate carbohydrates with being bad for you and causing weight gain which isn’t true at all. Carbs give you energy, energy that you need to live your life. Giving food these titles is super bad because if on the off-chance, you eat them, you’ll feel like a failure and a bad person. This is not a healthy mindset to have.
Thank you so much for reading. I don’t know if any of this made sense, I just got angry with seeing a tweet and it prompted a blog post haha! I understand that everyone is guilty of doing these, and I’m not writing this post saying that I’ve never done any because I probably have. I just hope that anyone reading this post will notice the wrong in any of these and make an active choice in stopping doing them. I hope you have a lovely day.